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A good mediator:
 Separates the people from the problem (i.e., does not personalize the argument)
Focuses on satisfying the interests behind the positions
Precisely states the areas of agreement and disagreement
Interprets the immediate conflict in terms of its long-term implications and its connection to other issues
Gets all the issues into the open (i.e., leaves no secrets that can destroy an agreement at a later time)
Quickly learns the motives and desires of each person in the dispute, and learns what each of them has to trade
Separates complex issues into their component parts so that each part can be discussed individually
Develops many alternative options (courses of action) for each disputed issue
Finds an alternative to the destructive method of attack and counter-attack
Assists each side of an argument to expand and clarify its ideas
Speeds up or slows down the discussion in order to achieve an appropriate pace
Asks questions in a neutral manner that does not offend or insult
Disagrees constructively and politely
Helps everyone advance their thinking towards logical conclusions
Asks for criticism and advice, and gratefully accepts that which is offered | 
